Equalize Now!
Equalize Now!

The New York Times is our not-so-secret channel to persuade the public

The New York Times has long been among our greatest supporters. Their editorial board and publisher have been helping us behind the scenes since before we even realized it was possible to elect candidates who shared our views. The NYTimes was key to the election of Barak Obama. They coordinated messages with the Obama campaign, suppressed investigative reporting of Obama, and fed other media outlets, including CBS, NBC, ABC, MSNBC, CNN, and numerous web-based media.

 

We take particular pride in the work of their influential columnists, whose writings we analyze from time to time.

RedState.com is our secret weapon for self-destruction of conservatives

RedState, the creation of Agent Erick Erickson, is doing phenomenal work this election cycle. We've enlisted him to help prevent the nomination and ultimate election of Mitt Romney, which would be a tremendous impediment to implementing equalize-now. We thought we had assured the election of Agent Obama when we persuaded Agents Bachmann, Perry, Gingrich, Santorum and Cain to run, but despite the valliant efforts of Agent Erickson and RedState, as well as Agent Hannity and Agent Limbaugh, Romney somehow has been able to get the most votes and delegates. Santorum has held out the longest, but he jumped the gun on going absurd. Our deal with him was that he would hold back on his social issues until he was nominated. But Agent Erickson is still doing everything possible to keep Romney at bay. We encourage all voters in Michigan and beyond to join with Agent Erickson, Agent Michael Moore, and Agent Markos "kos" Moulitsas.

 

RedState quickly bans any dissenters from Agent Erickson's viewpoint, so we encourage interested equalize-now adherents to visit but not comment. Remember, he's secretly working for us, both on RedState and in his speeches and TV appearances.

Rome
Rome is the great example of an empire that failed to equalize its wealth. Many people think the Roman empire collapsed from over-extending its reach and from moral decadence and decay. There are obvious parallels to America today, but the collapse of the family and the promotion of promiscuity are symptoms, not the disease. The disease is inequality. In a truly equal society, families will be strong. People won't resort to promiscuity, which is a result of depression, anxiety, and a sense of meaninglessness. 

Music
Inequality is leading to degradation in the quality of our music. People are stealing music off the Internet because they're too poor to pay for it. Consequently, fewer and fewer talented people enter the industry and we end up with no-talent entertainers such as Lady Gaga.

Old age
In an equal society, even the old will find happiness.